Date: 2006-06-25 02:49 am (UTC)
ext_6531: (Random: Smirking flapper)
From: [identity profile] lizbee.livejournal.com
Terribly good improvements. I'm quite impressed. Also, MORE PLS.

I agree with the earlier comments, the first two paragraphs are a bit exposition-heavy. I like the rest, though. *loves*

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