So here I am about to prepare my mid-revision lunch, and I'm holding a heavily pre-buttered piece of garlic bread in my hand and looking at the toaster.

MY FIRST THOUGHT: Hey, I bet I could just toast this right in here... (pops it in)

MY SECOND THOUGHT: No, because THAT'S HOW GREASE FIRES GET STARTED, YOU MORON. (pops it out)

I'm so glad myself and I had this little talk. But it goes to show how distracted I am by this book right now.
From a book of essays loaned to my agronomist husband by a well-meaning relative concerned about the potential health dangers of genetically modified foods:

"An emperor who went crazy started World War I. World War II was the project of a democratically elected chancellor who also went crazy and proclaimed himself Führer. Both took the world on a ride to hell. Now we are in the midst of World War III, and this time the Führers of biotechnology, with their mad scientists and greedy CEOs, are in the grip of so grand a megalomania, it makes Hitler look merely frightening and Emperor Wilhelm II look like a bully in a carnival suit."

*facedesk* Where do I begin?

(Also, what is a "carnival suit"? Is this like some kind of weird politically correct phrasing to avoid offending clowns? Inquiring minds want to know...)

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